I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Randomize
