isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
