just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Randomize
