Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
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