Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
