I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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