What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Come share oat with me in your robe
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
