The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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