Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
