very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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