his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize