yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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