you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
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