Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
You smell like stripper and shame
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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