You work out of a Hotel?
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
