I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
