If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Boobs are out for the taking
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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