woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
