i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize