covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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