Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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