We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
