I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
