I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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