ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Enjoy the penises
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
