i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
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