When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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