I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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