if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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