Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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