You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
