He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
