someone get that fucking seahorse.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
