I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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