you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
