Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.