but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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