I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Randomize
