So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize
