Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.