we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando