I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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