Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
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