so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
