I'm jealous of your bromance
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
of course. lets lasso hookers.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize