It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
