It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
