I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
