I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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