It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
