i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I stole a fireplace last night.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
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